Middle School: I Would Have Told Myself...

Written By: Emily Winter, The Letter Project Board Member

Middle school is both an energizing and turbulent time. As the word “middle” implies, you live in a state of in-between. You are adj. “Equally distant from the extremes,” or n. “in the position of being among or in the midst of something.” Funnily enough, maybe we should refer to the entirety of our life’s experiences as one big middle school, as we continually adapt, develop, progress, learn, expand, laugh, joke and play. It seems we are always in the middle of something, no matter our age. Particularly, as a young middle schooler you begin to question, and you begin to explore. You are not yet postured with life lessons and learning points to pivot you into greatness. You understand that you are considered a child, but you want to be listened to as an adult. You are asked to be well-rounded as you brush lightly on a variety of subjects, English, history, science, math, art, music, and sports. These classes are designed to help identify your interests, strengths, and weaknesses. Though what is predominantly highlighted, is the desire to fit in and to be well received by your peers. You will be met with moments of pressure, hesitancy, confusion, rejection, and challenges. But those will be balanced with friendships, recess, laughter, teamwork, and A+ papers. Most importantly, aside from the curriculum, the bus rides, the due dates, and homework, there is a special formula that is not always taught in school. A formula to meet you in the middle, and watch it all unfold as it should, and that is to just be you.

I would have told myself

o   Raise your hand…

Raise your hand high and often. When your teacher asks the class to consider an idea, a writing prompt, or a direct question, do not be fearful to ask or answer.

o   There are some dumb questions and that is ok…

Your teachers will tell you that there is no such thing as a dumb question. However, the sooner you accept that there are some dumb questions, the less timid you will be about asking them. You will ask dumb questions, and it is ok because you will have learned.

o   Bring an umbrella…

It is not uncool to carry an umbrella. When it is dark and rainy outside and you must wait for the bus or walk from your parent’s car to the front door of the school at drop off, staying dry is best. You look wretched when you walk into a building soaking wet. Plus, it is incredibly uncomfortable.

o   Wear a coat…

Same as above but with snow.

o   Shoot for the small habits…

The small, quirky habits you develop daily are what make you unique and defines your character. The accolade is just the prize you are given at the end of a very hard-earned day.

o   You do not NEED social media…

Hobbies and meaningful relationships with your family, peers, and teachers are quite fulfilling. Endless scrolling of what others have and the trips they take is a waste of precious time to develop your gifts and talents. Use in moderation to spot creativity and ideas and only DM, text, post, or update to support and add value back into the world. 

o   It is emphatically unlikely you are in love… 

Your crush may stand by your locker, write you a note in class, watch your soccer game or chase you in the hall but he or she is likely not in love with you. As you are also not likely to be in love with them. Enjoy your crushes, talk about them with your friends, journal about them, do not be afraid to compliment them and cry about them when the relationship ends. But know, around the corner there will be a new crush, waiting to make you smile again.

o   Be the unicorn not the chameleon…

You will learn it is so not cool to always like all the same things as everyone else. Wear the brands you like, buy the clothes you and your family can afford, teach others something they have never heard about, don’t only sit with the popular kids and play the most watched sports.

o   Spend time with your family…

Know that when you feel annoyed, hurt, angry or embarrassed, your parents and/or siblings love you and want the absolute best for you. Be honest with them about how you are feeling and try explaining what you need to feel and hear from them in return. Claim someone that you can confide in, even if that person is outside of your immediate family. Also, try to refrain from rolling your eyes, wearing a chip on your shoulder is not a good accessory.

o   Love yourself…

Learn early that you were created to perfection to be just the way that you are. Learn early that you will make mistakes, but you are resilient. Learn early that friends will come and go but that does not mean you are not well liked. Learn early that you are still growing into your face and body, and both are beautiful. Do not always wish for change and embrace what is right in front of you.