Hope in a Pandemic
/Written By: Caroline Marshall
The story of Joseph in the book of Genesis is one that I know well. Joseph’s brothers plot to kill him, throw him in a pit and sell him into slavery out of jealousy. However, it goes on to say that Joseph earns favor from Pharaoh eventually rises to power in Egypt and to make a very long story short, God ends up using Joseph in his position of power to save the lives of so many people from famine. So what does this have to do with me, an American girl living in 2020 during a worldwide pandemic? Quite a bit!
You see, in Genesis 50:20 Joseph says to his brothers, “As for you, you intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.” The God that brought beautiful purpose out of sin, jealousy, and evil is the same God that we are serving amidst the COVID-19 pandemic. He is the God who takes the most painful and challenging circumstances and uses them for the good of those who love Him.
The past few months have been marked by loss for all of us; the loss of jobs, graduations, proms, concerts, peace and quiet - you name it. These losses have left many people, including myself, feeling hurt, confused, stressed, and maybe even angry at God; and the enemy wants to leave us there. The enemy's intent in this season is to harm us and separate us from the love of our father, but God has already won the battle and declared victory over the schemes of the enemy. I wanted to share a few of the “but God” moments I have had during this pandemic that have given me hope and reminded of who is in control!
This weird time of quarantine, distancing, and isolation caused me to completely slow down. I was no longer able to fill up my life with school functions, coffee with friends, or other work. This exposed how uncomfortable I was with rest and I had to come to terms with the fact that it is okay to stop, slow down, and just be. This was the wake up call I think we all didn’t know we needed.
God took my faith back to its roots. Pre-pandemic, my life was absolutely full of ministry meetings, small groups, mentor coffee dates, and live sermons. Don’t get me wrong, those are all incredible and I miss them dearly, but coming home made me realize how much I was relying on other people and structured meetings to fuel my faith. Being stuck at home meant it was just me and God. At first I thought this meant I was doomed! No way I could learn and grow by myself. But what was at first scary has become the greatest blessing of this whole season. I have had months of time with just my Father - learning to look to him instead of others and growing more and more confident in my faith.
I have had quite a few divine appointments during this time at home, but my favorite one by far happened early on in quarantine when I was on a run. I was running in a neighborhood I don’t live in, at a time I normally never run, when I passed by a mentor of mine from high school who I hadn’t spent time with in a few years. We ended up running the rest of the path together and God completely reconnected our hearts. That run in March led to us getting together at least once a week to run and talk about all the Lord is doing in our lives. This relationship and the time we get to spend together has been such a gift, and would have never happened without COVID.
In the same realm, I never knew how much joy I would get from walks with friends. Walking six feet apart has become my new favorite way to spend time with the people I love. God shows up on these walks, every. single. time. They are good for my body and my soul.
I have learned more about myself in the past few months than in the last few years combined. There were no errands to run, no to-do lists to check off - just time. I had the time to sit down and sort through things about myself that I could normally just brush over thanks to the distractions of my normal, busy, life. Thanks to enneagram research, conversations with my family who has been trapped with me for months, and lots of prayer, I feel like I know myself significantly better than I did before this weird time. Best of all, I don’t feel like it’s been wasted. The Lord has grown me and taught me how to be a more like Jesus, and for that I am so so thankful.
… and so many more little things! I got to read for pleasure again. I learned how to crochet a teddy bear. I baked. A lot. I spent real, undistracted time with my family. The list goes on! The Lord showed up for me every day in new, small, thoughtful ways.
While I may never fully understand God’s plan for this time on this side of Heaven, I do know that despite all of the tragedy, He has shown up and revealed his goodness to me in ways that would not have happened without this strange, strange season. He is the same God who redeemed Joseph’s story and I am confident that despite everything that we are going through, He will redeem ours as well. No matter where we are, God sees us and loves us. I believe that one day when we tell the story of 2020 and everything that went wrong, we will be able to end it with “but God.”
We want to hear your “but God” moments too! If you have had any glimpses of hope, small victories, answered prayers, little joys, or anything else that has reminded you of the Lord’s faithfulness, share them with us at @toloveourselves.
